Tonight, after we arrived at our bed and breakfast near Limerick.
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| Our bedroom tonight. Such a charming old home and lovely hostess. |
We unloaded our luggage then went over to Bunratty Castle to have dinner at Durty Nellie’s Bar and Restaurant. The establishment was opened 400 years ago.
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| Durty Nellies. |
Our plan was to have dinner and then enjoy some authentic Irish pub music, since this is our last night in Ireland.
“I’m sorry,” our server told us, “There’ll be no music tonight.”
I wish you could hear the lilt in the Irish accent attached to those words. The language itself is full of music.
At the table in the corner sat a three-generation family. I’ve noticed a few lovely and unique things about Southern Irish social networks in the few days we’ve been here.
1. Folks are incredibly friendly.
They stop driving to let you cross the street, even when they have the right of way. They pull over for each other and let each other pass on the narrow curvy roads lined with tall hedgerows or rock walls. There is no, “I was first!” attitude, in general. Of course, there are always exceptions, but in general drivers are remarkably courteous.
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| One hundred thousand welcomes. This sign is posted in nearly every home and shop in Ireland. |
2. People are happy to pause.
They stop what they’ve set out to do to have a little chat, give a hug or kiss a neighbor’s cheek. We were driving up to the Filedarrig this morning, where Dave’s ancestors lived. It was a teeny road with a line of row houses up above Chapel Lane. On our way up we passed an elderly woman walking down the steep hill with her shopping cart, a scarf tied over her head and down under her chin. I rolled down my window to say good morning. Fresh Irish air rushed through the window. She paused and noted the beauty of this sunny morning, adding: “How are ye doin’ and where do ye come frum. Goodness, this day looks like it might be a little unsettled. I hope not, fer yer sakes.” Then, “Yes, there are little houses up there, might have been here when yer gram was. A row of them. One is in pretty bad shape, windows broken out and such. A Dutchman bought the two next to it and he’s resurrectin’ ‘em. He’s not here at da time, tho.”
Back home, we just answer back, “Good morning.” People here are willing to pause.
3. More men seem to gather in gaggles than women here.
More often, no matter what time of day, there are clusters of men, all ages, chatting and laughing. If there are women, they are there with their families.
4. Extended families spend time together.
All ages. In most of the pubs and restaurants we visited (the ones that were restaurants more than drinking establishments), there were large tables surrounded by multigenerational clans. Little kids, young adults, middle aged and senior citizens. They talked jovially, and shared space in a kind of rotating, comfortable fashion. Long relaxed meals where they leaned back in their chairs and breathed a little more slowly, letting the day digest with their dinners. I thought how swiftly we in America seem to gulp down a meal and move on to the next task. It makes me feel a bit sad for us.
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| See that stack of plates on the table? The woman on the right is the server. She came over to clear the table for this large family and just sat down for a chat instead. |
That little family in the corner of Durty Nellie’s tonight was just finishing up their dinner. I overheard one of the grandparents ask their grandson, who looked to be about seven years old, “Do you know what today is?” I could not hear his answer through the laughter of the tableful of young men in the other corner. But in a quiet intermission from laughter I heard the grandfather ask, “And who is the most important person then?” I
looked over at the boy and watched his response:
“Jesus.”
I had expected that this day was someone’s birthday or some other day for their family to celebrate with dinner. But his response reminded me that today is a holy day, Maundy Thursday, the day feet were washed, a new commandment was given, a last Passover supper was served, a sacramental ordinance was introduced, and twelve faithful disciples became eleven. Tonight, an intercessory prayer was spoken in a garden.
Of course there is no music in the pub tonight.
It’s fitting for us to pause.
A holy pause.
