3-8-18 CHORUS

I don't recall the obstetrician slapping the bottom of any of my babies. They just came out crying. I think they worked so hard to get out of there, or into here, that they just naturally drew in air and exhaled it with gusto. The throbbing of my heart, the embracing of my arms, the warmth of new flesh on my mushy bread-dough belly, the distinct fragrance of fresh blood and new life: all of these combined to cause a unique euphoria that can hardly be described. There must be a major release of serotonin or dopamine in the brain, that feel-good chemical we yearn for. There's a strange convergence of responses after delivering a baby without anesthesia. The pain and the physical work of labor and delivery results in an almost incomparable exhaustion. Couple that with the exhilaration of producing the miraculous creature that just emerged from within, and you have, what I consider to be, the deepest sense of creative fulfillment available to humankind. I believe it was the closest I have come to divinity in my human state. I am in awe that our Maker has enough confidence in us to allow us to participate in this process. 

I love the idea of the Great Creator empowering us to be creators; entrusting us with the processes of divinity.

We are, all of us, invited to be partakers of this holy practice: to create. We all have gifts associated with this godly trait. Finding them is part of our quest. Refining them, after we have found them,is a lifelong challenge.

As far back as I can remember I have embraced the creator in me. From clothespin dolls to glittered balloon models; kitchen recipes to hot-glued costumes, my hands enjoy creating. The fun factor is always high when I am creating; almost as high as the mess factor. But the closest I have come to that sense of fulfillment that came with bearing children is in the creation of songs. Very few labors require such focused effort from me. Maybe it's because I generally deal with ADD symptoms and I shift focus like a bumper car on a crowded day at Lagoon amusement park. I generally can't stay awake to read more than 20 minutes at a time. My mind just wants to wander. And I'm a disaster at organizing stuff because of my spastic attention span. But organizing words, and ideas, that's another matter. I can sit in my family room for 6 hours straight working on a song. I cannot figure out why I can do this, but it is my truth, even if there is no logical explanation.

The crafting of a strong lyric is, no joke, a real labor. A strong lyric is going to look like it was easy. It should flow naturally, like it always existed, but to get it there is some crazy mysteriously hard work! Music has it's difficulty as well, but the HARD, for me, is in the word-smithing. So when a song finally emerges in it's completed state, with all it's parts working, like a newborn who passes its APGAR test, it is glorious. 

We humans occupy this earth in such masses that we forget the wonder of our individual existence. Every single one of us began as imperceivable cells that multiplied and were added upon until we emerged wet and warm and screaming with life. If we really thought about it we would be pausing in awestruck wonder when we pass each other on the street, recognizing the glory of creation.

When I teach songwriting workshops I talk about song structure. Most popular songs use what is called a verse-chorus song form, meaning there are verses and a chorus. The verses vary, but the chorus generally remains the same. And, I tell my students, the chorus is the king. All verses bow down to the king. Or you can consider the chorus "home" and all verses are roads that lead to home.

However you describe it, the gist of the matter is that the Chorus is what we end up walking away with, the part we remember and repeat most often. And usually within the chorus is a thing we call the "hook", or the chain of words that are the most catchy or the most meaningful part of the song. Often the hook is also the title of the song. Pay attention and see if you can figure out the hook of some of your favorite songs.

Anyway, I got to thinking the other day, as I was working on a new song, that the best songs have nice, strong, relatively short choruses with repeating hooks. I got to thinking that I am like the song. My life is my song. I have lived a series of verses in my extended life, but each verse brings me back to my chorus. I have been pondering, without any absolute conclusion, this question:

What is my chorus?

I think it is something I will probably be working on for a while, like the song I've been chiseling away at this week. I noticed in my writing notebook that the first version of this particular as-yet-unfinished song was written in 2003. So far I have been pregnant with this song for 15 years! Sheesh! Get born already, song!

You'll see, on a typical song lyric sheet, a format that indicates  Verse 1, then the CHORUS. Then you'll see Verse 2 and these words:

REPEAT CHORUS. The best songs have REPEAT CHORUS two or three times.

I am, in so many ways, a work in progress; a song yet to be sung. But today I realized that it's about time I nail down my chorus. By now I should pretty much know what this tune is about, so that I can easily go to REPEAT CHORUS now and again. I'm not exactly sure what words will best express the chorus of my life, but I'm quite certain I want the word "love" in the hook.