SURFACE TENSION

Last year my brother, George Hansen, was one of four persons awarded the Governor’s Medal for science and technology in Utah. President Russell M Nelson, the world-renowned heart surgeon who also happens to now be the living prophet, also received the award that day. It was such a treat to be present when they received this recognition from Governor Herbert. My brother is a gifted scientist.

Two scientific pioneers with hearts of gold.
George Hansen and Russel M Nelson, M.D.

Other Medal recipients (my brother is in the middle.)

Eight years ago, I also received a medal from Governor Herbert, but mine was in the arts. I, for reasons I do not understand, received the 2012 Governor's Mansion Artist award, along with the gifted glass artist Tom Holdman, whose life and work I greatly admire.  

The first and last time I wore my medal.

Tom Holdman's stained glass art
is seen all over the world. He's as
kind and genuine as he is talented.

George and I thought we should take a picture of ourselves wearing our respective medals; his in Science and mine in the Arts. The only problem was that I could not for the life of me find my medal. This is a problem in my life. I think I am putting something in the most logical, safe place. But my logic changes hourly. Alas, we do not have a photo of the two of us donning those medals (that no one ever in the history of humankind wears beyond the day they receive them.) 

George has a propensity for teasing me about my lack of scientific understanding. (I try not to tease him about his weaknesses. Just saying.) Truth is, when George explains science to me, I can understand it, because George is also a creative, which is partly why he owns dozens of scientific patents. He is a good pretender. We share that gift. 
George can explain complex concepts in layman’s terms. If my science teachers had used those methods to teach in high school, I may not have completely lost interest in Chemistry. Because, truth is, all science is creative. I mean Creative, with a capital “C”, in that the originator of all substance and its behavior was just that, the Great Creator. 

I remember when my daughter Annie was in elementary school. Her science fair project one year examined the processes of surfactants. Surfactants are in soaps, cleaning supplies, even the human body. They break surface tension, attract dirt and empower molecules to be removed by water. At least I think I remember that being the case. (Like I said, my medal is in the arts.)

Anyway, that whole concept of surfactants has been on my mind since this Covid 19 thing started. I even did that little experiment with my grandkids, Calvin and Beth, where they shook pepper on a bowl of water, then added a drop of soap, which made the pepper scurry away. I was teaching them about how important it was to wash their hands.

But on a deeper level, I am thinking about how other aspects of my life need to follow the pattern of surfactants. This whole pandemic has created tension everywhere. The surface of this whole huge planet is covered with tension. and yet, the tension is personal to each of us. The things that break my emotional tension include all sorts of things: 
Laughter: I send a joke a day to my kids and grandkids, as well as a scripture of the day.
Communication: By phone, or to a larger group through social media and technology, (since actual physical interaction is off the table). I write every single day, whether or not I feel like it.
Service: I need to provide service daily. For me that service has manifest most often in the kitchen and at my desk, through cooking and writing. Whatever it is I create must be shared in order for it to be “service”, which can be tricky these days. But I do it. 
Self Talk: Seriously. I talk to myself. Out loud. 
Breathe: Five deep breaths in, and slowly out. Not a big deal, but important as part of my routine. 
These are just a few of my tension breakers. Everybody gets to find their own.

This little Covid 19 molecule, as far as I know, has not entered my body. So far, so good. But its effects have entered my life in a profound way, and the lives of the people I love. There is not a soul I know who is not feeling the tension.

I remind myself, and I remind you, that awareness of the tension is healthy. This thing we are going through is hard! When we recognize it, we can analyze and utilize methods for breaking it up. 
On the other hand, fixating on the tension itself, rather than the “symbolic surfactants” that help break the tension, can be paralyzing. So, let’s think about what breaks tension for us, before we end up breaking it in unhealthy ways. Go for a walk, breathe deeply - exhale slowly, tell a joke, read something inspiring. Tighten your muscles one by one, then release them one by one. Color a picture. Work. Work even when you don’t feel like it. The sense of self that comes with work can be a tension buster. There are so many options.

But resist, if possible, the age-old tension reliever that binds itself to chocolate. That is sure to facilitate the gaining of what I call the Covid 19 (as in 19 pounds of excess body fat). Then again, if that’s what it takes to get through… go for it. What do I know.

Here’s a little scientific fact, from a non-scientist:

In COVID-19, 'CO' stands for 'corona,' 'VI' for 'virus,' and 'D' for disease. Formerly, this disease was referred to as “2019 novel coronavirus” or “2019-nCoV”. There are many types of human coronaviruses including some that commonly cause mild upper-respiratory tract illnesses.

By the way, I did find my medal recently when I was cleaning out our study. Apparently, I had thought a logical place for it was in the little hidden drawer of a ribbon box. I was putting that box in a bin to be donated to Deseret Industries. Good thing I opened that little drawer first. Go figure. 

(Covid 19 toll to date: 74,654)

LIKE THE ONE YOU'RE WITH

"...if you can't be with the one you love, Honey,
love the one you're with."

If you're going to be stuck alone with somebody for an indeterminate period of time, it would be dandy if you liked them. Love matters, yes, but when you get down to the day-in, day-out of closeness, "like" is the word of choice. If you have to dig deep into the love department, it usually means they, or you, are not being particularly likeable. If you are reading this now, at the end of March 2020, you probably know exactly what I mean. I do not know a single human being who is not feeling whacked and gobsmacked by the current pandemic that has confined most of us to social isolation. We are hunkered down in our homes, or apartments, with the people who share the same address, whether or not they are family. We are all trying to keep ourselves functionally conscious while dealing with a massive overdose of closeness. 

Libby told me tonight about a teenage neighbor who decided, just for fun, that he was not going to shower until this thing was over. He thought it was funny. The rest of his family jumped him last night and dragged him into the shower.

Every time I think about certain people, like my friend with two autistic kids, or my widowed neighbors who live alone, or the multiple friends and family who have multiple kids they are now "home schooling", having to deal with multiple teachers’ online requirements for each of their kids, I pause and say a prayer with their specific names attached, because there's not much more I can do from my isolated space. I have so much respect for everybody, seriously, EVERYBODY who is enduring this.

My first personal friend was hospitalized today with Covid 19. His wife, my dear friend, also has it at home. It feels like the fog is creeping in through the cracks in the door and I can't stop it.

Dave was just talking a few minutes ago about something or other, saying: “when this whole thing is over and we are able to gather again….” 

I responded, "I wonder how much personal sorrow there will be for us between now and then?" 

We have a sincere general sorrow, for humankind, for specific areas and cultures. But I can't say, because I don’t know, how deep the personal tragedy may be for us. I try not to fixate on that, of course, because I do not have much power over it, besides following the rules set out to keep us safe. But I also allow myself to consider it occasionally, because it leads me to respect the parameters set around us, and sends me to an attitude of prayer and gratitude for what I do have... and what I do not have.

As this day winds to its close, I want to acknowledge that I am most blessed to actually LIKE the person I am stuck with. I love him, yes, but the fact that I like him, and he likes me, just makes this whole murky mess more bearable. Of course, there are moments. We are humans, after all, though there are times I think Dave may be one of the 3 Nephites who were granted their heart's desire to not taste of death but to continue to do good on the earth. Then again, I've seen, in 42 years of marriage, evidence to the contrary, even if it's rare.

Today my Covid Pal celebrates one more run around the sun. I'm grateful we are still running this race together. (Well, he is running. I'm hobbling. But he is really nice about waiting for me.)

Happy Birthday, Dave.

My favorite roomie.
With the German Chocolate cake I made today,
because I make it a habit to always have
40 extra pounds of butter in our fridge or freezer.
Seriously, I've done this for years. Stockpiled butter.
I cook a lot.
(#anditshows)
Everything's better with butter.

(coronavirus deaths to date: 37,830 -  totals taken from the website worldometer.com)