2023/8 COMMON THREADS

I spend an inordinate amount of time in this comfy black recliner in our family room. I sort of fell in love with recliners when I had Guillain Barre Syndrome and was confined to one for months before my legs got back under my hips. Before then I had not spent much time in a recliner…ever. Now this nice yummy leather has formed to me and wraps me sweetly, holding the small of my back safely in her arms. 

Most of my word-families are born in this easy chair, tapped out on a laptop keyboard. Many essay length dreams have been played out here. And small song embryo, which end up moving to the couch where the guitar fits better if they start growing to fruition. 

My view from this spot includes the rock fireplace, the TV screen if we have it lifted from the fooled-you console under the painting that used to hang in Dave’s law office. On the opposite wall is a lovely row of glass doors, four of them, that stand regimentally between the house and the back deck. 

There are red checkered roman shades on all four doors. They’ve been there since we built this house. Twenty-nine years now. I’ve replaced the strings that lift the blinds at least twice and sewn in eighty new little metal rings through which the strings slide to lift and lower the cloth shades. Because the glass on these doors in low-e and blocks UV light, the front facing fabric has not faded after all these years.

I have repeatedly told myself I should replace these blinds. I even have yardage of a nice neutral gray tweed-ish material in the bottom drawer of my sewing/craft dresser. But every time I actually think about it, I can’t bring myself to change my roman shades, mostly because I like them the way they are.

I doubt myself all the time, wondering if I am becoming that kind of old person who can’t let go of the familiar. I’m not against updating. Very few pieces in this room were here when these shades were installed. And if these shades were no longer functional, they’d be gone. But every Christmas, and every Thanksgiving, I like the feeling I get with these traditional plaid shades, the red in the fabric speaking warmth and family and dripping with memories. 

I wonder if one of my angels is keeping a transcript of the discussions I have with myself:

Me: you really should update this place

Also Me: Yeah, I know. I’m getting a little stale, huh?

Me: Yes. Why don’t you get in the car and drive somewhere and find something fresh and new and exciting

Also Me: I like the idea of getting in the car and driving somewhere and looking at new stuff. But when we’re done can we come back home to warm and comfy? I really like the cozy feel we have going here. 

I imagine the hip and happenin’ Me winning out, then two years down the road the Real Me goes down in the basement and drags out the familiar old plaid roman shades, because you know she kept them just in case, and reinstalls them. Then she sits in her comfy worn-out leather recliner and sighs.

So many magical moments have these trusty red plaid roman shades as a backdrop.

There is so much change I cannot control. This I can.

I’m hanging on to common threads.

 

Many a bridal and baby shower
has taken place in front of these shades.

Uncle George pretending to be the grinch
(with Joe)

Rehearsals for Christmas concerts
(with the Eskeltones)

Easter cookies with the Grands

...and Grand Christmas gatherings

Brand New Years with brand new babies
(Annie and Baby Beth)

Holiday house parades with Auntie Kate...

...and Unkin John

Years and years of Saltwerks songwriter gatherings

Santa secrets
(Anna Bella and Paul Dickamore... I mean, Santa)

...and more new babies
(Tess)

Helping Gumpa hang Christmas ornaments
(Calvin)

Newly returned Elder John Connors
making Merry on Christmas Eve with
Bea and Manu visiting from France

There's a lot of my life tucked up in those folds of fabric.