4-1-19 HARVEST

In the spring of 1957 the BBC reported that Swiss farmers were experiencing a record spaghetti crop. Italians were migrating en masse into Switzerland to reap the harvest, some of them risking treacherous mountain passes in order to escape the long lines at border crossings. The crop came after a particularly sunny March, with even tempered rainfall. Spaghetti trees, in particular, produced nearly five times their typical fruit. Manicotti and Rigatoni bushes did not fare as well. It appears that on April 1st the border guards were held hostage as angry Italians took truckloads of the spring spaghetti harvest over into the territory where, Italians claim, they own the birthright to spaghetti.

In celebration of this historic harvest I planned a spaghetti dinner for my crew. This was years ago, when I had a nightly crew of hungry mouths to feed at my kitchen table. I set the table with a vinyl tablecloth and no plates, though I did provide serving utensils, fanned out around the perimeter of the empty table. When the kids got home from school they each made their way instantly to the large heavy metal pot on the kitchen stove where fresh marinara had been simmering all day. Fresh ground tomatoes, crushed garlic and plenty of hand torn basil bubbled away. Each kid, one by one, dipped a spoon into the pot, blew on it with a long steady breath of air, rumbling their pleasure in the back of their throats after they swallowed. They knew what was coming, so they all made it a point to be home for dinner. After Dave finally arrived, repeating the same family ritual of testing whatever is simmering on the stove, we gathered round the kitchen table and prayed for the Lord to bless this food to our health. Annie asked where the plates were. I did not reply.

"Um, Mom, do you want me to get the plates?"

"Nah, we're OK," I replied, walking over to the table with a huge pasta bowl filled with spaghetti covered in heavenly sauce. Before anyone else could say anything, I dumped the whole serving bowl of pasta onto the table, spreading it out along the oblong top, singing aloud as I did it:

"Mangiamo!"

(that's Italian for "Let's eat!")

They all looked at me, stunned, waiting for me to give logic to what just happened. 

"April Fools. Enjoy your dinner."

They each grabbed one of the awkward serving utensils and dug in, because, as we all know, spaghetti doesn't grow on trees and you have to get it whenever and however you can.

An April Fools lemonade toast to one and all! May you harvest some hilarious memories.

In 1996, Taco Bell,
the fast-food restaurant chain,
duped people when it announced
it had agreed to purchase Philadelphia’s 
Liberty Bell and intended to rename it the
Taco Liberty Bell.

 In 1998, after Burger King advertised
 a “Left-Handed Whopper,”
scores of clueless customers
requested the fake sandwich.

In 1985, Sports Illustrated tricked many
 of its readers when it ran a made-up article
 about a rookie pitcher named Sidd Finch 
who could throw a fastball over 
168 miles per hour.